"Waking Up" (Roy/Envy, Rated PG-13)
Nov. 26th, 2009 07:43 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
skellywagTitle: Waking Up
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
skellywag
Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist
Pairing Roy/Envy
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Um. None that I can think of. This is honestly pretty tame.
A/N: Written forravenpirate's birthday. This probably won't have much significance to anyone else. It's sort of set halfway through a series of Roy/Envy roleplay logs we were doing. During the part of their interactions when they're actually sort of happy with each other. If you're interested in reading those logs, you can find them here. I HOPE IT'S OKAY. I didn't think I'd write Envy very well, so I sort of fudged it.
~~~~~~~~~~
Roy Mustang awoke beside a stranger. A stranger with a familiar face, but still a stranger. Long blonde hair lay tousled on his pillow, and that, perhaps, was even more unexpected. While he had woken up beside a few strangers in the past—more than a few if he was really honest—especially after returning from Ishval, he had never shared his bed with a blonde. Which was rather strange, in retrospect. Various blondes had otherwise played very large roles in his life thus far. He had seen this one before, but only briefly.
This blonde…was a question mark. Roy gently brushed silky locks out of the young man's face so that he could have a better look. Of course. This young man looked very much like Edward, and that was to be expected. His expression was so peaceful, so placid in sleep, but the longer Roy looked, he was better able to recognize part of his lover in this oh, so familiar-but-not face.
Thin but well-formed lips, still swollen and flushed from what had occupied them the night before, had curled into a familiar smirk. But in sleep, it was lacking something. As if age and knowledge and cynicism had leaked away. The wryness, the cruelty that could usually be found in that tiny twist of lips had all but evaporated, leaving someone who looked downright boyish. This person could have even been gentle.
Actually, the lips were the only feature identical to what Roy remembered of his lover. However, the shape of the forehead, the line of the jaw, the slope of the nose… They were different, but not in the normal way that two people had different faces. It was as if these features and the ones that Roy was used to seeing belonged on a single face. Which, in a roundabout way, they did. The conclusion made him smile. Honestly, it had been a little discomfiting at first, to find himself in bed with this stranger-who-wasn't. Like he was cheating.
Now? Now he leaned in for a kiss. It wasn't cheating, damnit.
With his lover asleep, Roy was able to make the kiss light and gentle, and keep it that way. They had never kissed much, and those they had shared were something hungry, brutal—more bite than kiss. He didn't mind fierceness in the bedroom (or whatever room they happened to be in), but his lover was always rather rough and abrupt. Roy enjoyed this opportunity for a soft, slow kiss. He could take his time, actually taste his lover's mouth without the metallic flavour of blood to mar it. He could revel in the fact that the kiss was returned as slowly and gently as Roy gave it, because this stranger-but-not was still asleep and unaware of what he was doing.
"Envy," he murmured quietly. And just like that, the spell was broken. The blonde's eyes flickered open, and Roy was momentarily stunned. Identical in shape to those he was used to seeing, but the colour was all Elric: lion amber. And then Envy blinked and his entire body Shifted. Shorter and more lithe, though still naked—a gymnast's body, or maybe an acrobat's. His skin became utterly pale. Longer hair that was so black it looked green. And of course those eyes, much more fitting for something cold-blooded, except that they were brilliant violet. Beautiful.
But even as Envy called this his favourite form, lauded his own perfection for anyone who would listen—namely Roy and Edward—Roy disagreed. Well, at least on the second point; Envy's opinion was his own. He thought about asking Envy why this form was his favourite. It was likely only to upset the volatile homunculus, however, and Roy had little interest in starting his morning with a fight.
Instead, Roy transposed blonde hair, lion eyes, Elric features over the ones he saw. It made him smile, because this young man was one who was capable of looking relaxed, peaceful. Not cold. No hard edges. This was someone he could love; someone who would actually allow himself to be loved. Anyone who was afraid to need another person could not be perfect, according to Roy's definition of the word. Perfection did not include a fear of vulnerability.
"What is it, Mustang?" Envy's voice was still very thick with sleep, but it was the accusation in his tone that broke Roy's illusion. No, that other young man would never be his lover, but that was okay. He could make do with the stolen glances. He had never expected Envy to give him any more than that, had in fact expected far less.
"It's nothing," Roy answered with a faint smirk. He leaned in to nip at his lover's throat placatingly. If possible, Envy could be even more unpleasant first thing in the morning than he was naturally. "I don't know why I woke you." Which was, of course, a bold-faced lie. One did not wake sleeping dragons without good reason (and without knowing just how much fire they might breathe).
Roy had woken Envy entirely for this change. He had seen the blonde young man before, though this was the first time he'd truly had opportunity to scrutinize. The other times had been all too brief flashes before some slight movement or imperceptible sound had awakened Envy, a very light sleeper. Most nights, Envy did not even sleep deeply enough to loosen his grip on whatever power it was that gave him the ability to shapeshift. It didn't seem like the homunculus was even aware of his spontaneous shift in the mornings. All the better, really. Envy would probably get angry if he knew Roy had seen him in that state, and somehow it would all be Roy's fault. Or, inexplicably, it would be Edward's fault. Sometimes, Envy's logic could be stunning in its lack of anything resembling logic.
All that aside, it was not for any sort of concern for the homunculus's reaction that he'd woken Envy. It was not out of respect for his lover's privacy—in choosing to sleep in Roy's bed, Envy had forfeited a measure of his right to privacy. No, Roy had woken Envy because he refused to grow attached to someone he could not have.
He didn't even know if the man with the soft blonde hair and peaceful expression had ever existed—even if he had, he certainly no longer did. Roy cared about Envy as he was, of course, but at the same time, he found Envy's self-proclaimed "perfection" lacking. Nothing created by man could be perfect, not without Grace. Humanity, as flawed as it was, could just as easily (though with less frequency) have moments of absolute perfection. It was as if the blonde was the personification of Envy's remaining humanity, and the homunculus perceived it as something to be hidden, buried beneath the skin of the monster he fancied himself to be. And how was that different from people? Human "monsters" just as often buried their humanity beneath a pleasant shell. Roy, at least, received glimpses of Envy's humanity, as if it wanted to assure him of its existence.
Roy didn't want to get attached to what he had come to view as his lover's humanity. He couldn't be certain he wasn't just deluding himself. He was the one who had decided that the blonde he was looking at was Envy's humanity. There was no reason to believe he was actually right. And then there was the fact that Envy was old. Humans older than fifty or so tended to get set in their ways—Envy had a couple of centuries on everyone who was currently alive. He would only be more stubborn and reluctant to change. And boy, had Roy seen evidence of that.
The man sighed and let his fingers very lightly trace Envy's forehead, nose, cheekbone, jaw, throat… At some point, the homunculus had realized that Roy waking him hadn't been a proposition, and he'd lost interest and fallen back to sleep. He hummed and preened, half-aware of the feather-light touches, but didn't open his eyes. Roy was apparently getting away with quite a bit this morning.
He knew he was unlikely to have more than these rare, stolen gentle moments. Envy couldn't allow himself any vulnerability; Roy supposed he had been hurt too badly in the past, though that pain was only ever acknowledged as rage and bitterness. If Envy wouldn't give all of himself, well, Roy would take what he could get. After all, when the homunculus wasn't deliberately trying to make him miserable (and even, sometimes, when he was), Envy actually made Roy happy. In these quieter moments, the man wondered if maybe Envy would let Roy make him happy, too. That certainly looked like a tiny smile on the homunculus's half-asleep lips.
Author:
skellywagFandom: Fullmetal Alchemist
Pairing Roy/Envy
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Um. None that I can think of. This is honestly pretty tame.
A/N: Written for
ravenpirate's birthday. This probably won't have much significance to anyone else. It's sort of set halfway through a series of Roy/Envy roleplay logs we were doing. During the part of their interactions when they're actually sort of happy with each other. If you're interested in reading those logs, you can find them here. I HOPE IT'S OKAY. I didn't think I'd write Envy very well, so I sort of fudged it.Roy Mustang awoke beside a stranger. A stranger with a familiar face, but still a stranger. Long blonde hair lay tousled on his pillow, and that, perhaps, was even more unexpected. While he had woken up beside a few strangers in the past—more than a few if he was really honest—especially after returning from Ishval, he had never shared his bed with a blonde. Which was rather strange, in retrospect. Various blondes had otherwise played very large roles in his life thus far. He had seen this one before, but only briefly.
This blonde…was a question mark. Roy gently brushed silky locks out of the young man's face so that he could have a better look. Of course. This young man looked very much like Edward, and that was to be expected. His expression was so peaceful, so placid in sleep, but the longer Roy looked, he was better able to recognize part of his lover in this oh, so familiar-but-not face.
Thin but well-formed lips, still swollen and flushed from what had occupied them the night before, had curled into a familiar smirk. But in sleep, it was lacking something. As if age and knowledge and cynicism had leaked away. The wryness, the cruelty that could usually be found in that tiny twist of lips had all but evaporated, leaving someone who looked downright boyish. This person could have even been gentle.
Actually, the lips were the only feature identical to what Roy remembered of his lover. However, the shape of the forehead, the line of the jaw, the slope of the nose… They were different, but not in the normal way that two people had different faces. It was as if these features and the ones that Roy was used to seeing belonged on a single face. Which, in a roundabout way, they did. The conclusion made him smile. Honestly, it had been a little discomfiting at first, to find himself in bed with this stranger-who-wasn't. Like he was cheating.
Now? Now he leaned in for a kiss. It wasn't cheating, damnit.
With his lover asleep, Roy was able to make the kiss light and gentle, and keep it that way. They had never kissed much, and those they had shared were something hungry, brutal—more bite than kiss. He didn't mind fierceness in the bedroom (or whatever room they happened to be in), but his lover was always rather rough and abrupt. Roy enjoyed this opportunity for a soft, slow kiss. He could take his time, actually taste his lover's mouth without the metallic flavour of blood to mar it. He could revel in the fact that the kiss was returned as slowly and gently as Roy gave it, because this stranger-but-not was still asleep and unaware of what he was doing.
"Envy," he murmured quietly. And just like that, the spell was broken. The blonde's eyes flickered open, and Roy was momentarily stunned. Identical in shape to those he was used to seeing, but the colour was all Elric: lion amber. And then Envy blinked and his entire body Shifted. Shorter and more lithe, though still naked—a gymnast's body, or maybe an acrobat's. His skin became utterly pale. Longer hair that was so black it looked green. And of course those eyes, much more fitting for something cold-blooded, except that they were brilliant violet. Beautiful.
But even as Envy called this his favourite form, lauded his own perfection for anyone who would listen—namely Roy and Edward—Roy disagreed. Well, at least on the second point; Envy's opinion was his own. He thought about asking Envy why this form was his favourite. It was likely only to upset the volatile homunculus, however, and Roy had little interest in starting his morning with a fight.
Instead, Roy transposed blonde hair, lion eyes, Elric features over the ones he saw. It made him smile, because this young man was one who was capable of looking relaxed, peaceful. Not cold. No hard edges. This was someone he could love; someone who would actually allow himself to be loved. Anyone who was afraid to need another person could not be perfect, according to Roy's definition of the word. Perfection did not include a fear of vulnerability.
"What is it, Mustang?" Envy's voice was still very thick with sleep, but it was the accusation in his tone that broke Roy's illusion. No, that other young man would never be his lover, but that was okay. He could make do with the stolen glances. He had never expected Envy to give him any more than that, had in fact expected far less.
"It's nothing," Roy answered with a faint smirk. He leaned in to nip at his lover's throat placatingly. If possible, Envy could be even more unpleasant first thing in the morning than he was naturally. "I don't know why I woke you." Which was, of course, a bold-faced lie. One did not wake sleeping dragons without good reason (and without knowing just how much fire they might breathe).
Roy had woken Envy entirely for this change. He had seen the blonde young man before, though this was the first time he'd truly had opportunity to scrutinize. The other times had been all too brief flashes before some slight movement or imperceptible sound had awakened Envy, a very light sleeper. Most nights, Envy did not even sleep deeply enough to loosen his grip on whatever power it was that gave him the ability to shapeshift. It didn't seem like the homunculus was even aware of his spontaneous shift in the mornings. All the better, really. Envy would probably get angry if he knew Roy had seen him in that state, and somehow it would all be Roy's fault. Or, inexplicably, it would be Edward's fault. Sometimes, Envy's logic could be stunning in its lack of anything resembling logic.
All that aside, it was not for any sort of concern for the homunculus's reaction that he'd woken Envy. It was not out of respect for his lover's privacy—in choosing to sleep in Roy's bed, Envy had forfeited a measure of his right to privacy. No, Roy had woken Envy because he refused to grow attached to someone he could not have.
He didn't even know if the man with the soft blonde hair and peaceful expression had ever existed—even if he had, he certainly no longer did. Roy cared about Envy as he was, of course, but at the same time, he found Envy's self-proclaimed "perfection" lacking. Nothing created by man could be perfect, not without Grace. Humanity, as flawed as it was, could just as easily (though with less frequency) have moments of absolute perfection. It was as if the blonde was the personification of Envy's remaining humanity, and the homunculus perceived it as something to be hidden, buried beneath the skin of the monster he fancied himself to be. And how was that different from people? Human "monsters" just as often buried their humanity beneath a pleasant shell. Roy, at least, received glimpses of Envy's humanity, as if it wanted to assure him of its existence.
Roy didn't want to get attached to what he had come to view as his lover's humanity. He couldn't be certain he wasn't just deluding himself. He was the one who had decided that the blonde he was looking at was Envy's humanity. There was no reason to believe he was actually right. And then there was the fact that Envy was old. Humans older than fifty or so tended to get set in their ways—Envy had a couple of centuries on everyone who was currently alive. He would only be more stubborn and reluctant to change. And boy, had Roy seen evidence of that.
The man sighed and let his fingers very lightly trace Envy's forehead, nose, cheekbone, jaw, throat… At some point, the homunculus had realized that Roy waking him hadn't been a proposition, and he'd lost interest and fallen back to sleep. He hummed and preened, half-aware of the feather-light touches, but didn't open his eyes. Roy was apparently getting away with quite a bit this morning.
He knew he was unlikely to have more than these rare, stolen gentle moments. Envy couldn't allow himself any vulnerability; Roy supposed he had been hurt too badly in the past, though that pain was only ever acknowledged as rage and bitterness. If Envy wouldn't give all of himself, well, Roy would take what he could get. After all, when the homunculus wasn't deliberately trying to make him miserable (and even, sometimes, when he was), Envy actually made Roy happy. In these quieter moments, the man wondered if maybe Envy would let Roy make him happy, too. That certainly looked like a tiny smile on the homunculus's half-asleep lips.
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on 2009-11-26 04:01 pm (UTC)gfhdbhjgfd
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